Everybody Hates You

There you go again, center of attention Nobody remembers giving you the job Every conversation turns into a sermon Every little thought deserves applause You interrupt before the sentence finishes Then explain what everybody meant Confidence is great in moderation Yours escaped the fence Hold on Wait for it Here it comes There it is Everybody hates you Nobody has said it yet Everybody hates you Thought you oughta know by now Every eye rolls when you walk in Every smile’s pretend Everybody hates you We’re just the first to say it loud Asked if everybody’s having fun tonight That’s when I almost choked Then you told that same damn story once again Same punchline, same joke You name-drop people you’ve never even met Like we’re supposed to be impressed Then you asked why everybody seemed so quiet Buddy, take a guess One more story One more lie One more reason Here tonight That’s enough That’s enough Same joke same lie same story same guy Same look same grin every single damn time Here we go! Talk talk talk never saying a thing Walk walk walk like you’re some kind of king That’s him! Me me me every word every day You you you got something else to say Oh my God! Name drop humble brag backhand compliment Every little sentence somehow sounds arrogant Nailed it! Everybody nods Everybody smiles Everybody’s counting down the miles Somebody tell him! Everybody’s tired of your crap Everybody hates you Now somebody said it loud Everybody hates you No more dancing around Every eye rolls when you walk in Every smile’s pretend Everybody hates you Thought you should know by now Everybody hates you It’s honestly impressive Everybody hates you That takes real commitment There There Somebody finally told you You’re welcome Everybody hates you